How to Deal With a Bad Boss

We have all had one, a bad boss.  A study by Life Meets Work found that 56% of American workers claim their boss is mildly or highly toxic.  Unfortunately, all of these bad bosses are wreaking havoc on their employee’s careers and emotional well-being.  According to the American Psychological Association, 75% of Americans say that their boss is the most stressful part of their workday. Additionally, having a bad manager is one of the most cited reasons for leaving a job.  Oftentimes, we don’t know how to deal with a bad boss so it can cause long-term damage to our careers.

However, I’ll dare to say there can be a silver lining to having a bad boss. They can actually help you become a good leader. I’ve had a few bad managers over the course of my career. As awful as those bosses were, they helped me strengthen important skills and become a better leader myself.

So, while having a bad boss is never fun, it can be helpful for your career if you learn how to deal with them effectively.

Here are some strategies on how to deal with a bad boss.

Look For The Best in Your Boss

The first thing you should do is look for the best in your bad boss. Instead of assuming they are trying to be a bad boss, assume that they don’t know how to be a good one.

Leadership is an intricate art and it is not for everyone.  Many times people get promoted based on how well they do the job rather than their leadership ability.  Instead of getting mad and taking things personally, try to seek an understanding of why they are making the decisions they are. More than likely it is stemming from a place of insecurity or naivety.  Try to find empathy for them over anger.

Understandably, this is hard to do however you will find that you will be less stressed and upset if you take the high road.

Ask For What You Need From Your Boss

Be very open and specific in terms of what you need.  Sometimes bosses don’t understand what their employees need and employees don’t feel that they can ask.  This just makes a bad situation even worse.

If you need more autonomy, ask for it in a professional and respectful way.  Saying something like “I have found over the course of my career, I learn and perform best when given some freedom to figure things out. I feel I may serve this role better if I have a bit more autonomy. I understand this project is important for you, so I would be happy to meet with you weekly to discuss my progress and gain your feedback.”

Keeping your request professional and focused on how it will help the company will make it hard for your boss to say no.  If they do say no, then you can respectfully ask for their concerns which will open up healthy dialogue.

Leverage your Mentor

Mentors can be extremely helpful when dealing with bad bosses.

First, they can provide a sounding board where you can safely vent and discuss your situation.  You don’t want to complain to coworkers so having someone you can go to is important.

Secondly, they can provide invaluable advice and help you navigate the rocky waters. They have likely experienced their own awful manager, so they have the experience that you can draw upon. Don’t be afraid to ask them questions, get suggestions on how you can approach situations differently, etc.

If you don’t have a mentor, check out this post for tips on how to find one —> How to Find a Mentor

Escalate Your Concerns

If you have tried other solutions and nothing seems to be working, you may need to escalate the situation to your boss’s manager or Human Resources. I would say this should be a last resort option, as much as I hate to say that.

The reason being, that you can’t go back from this.  If your boss is bad, they are likely to hold a grudge which will make the situation even tougher.  I’m not saying this to discourage you from escalating the situation, I just want you to use caution when doing so. I have seen employees do this before it ended up backfiring on them and ends up hurting their careers.

If your boss isn’t listening to your careers, your coworkers are likely to experience the same.   One way that you can escalate concerns more safely is to come forward as a group, rather than individually.   There is strength and safety in numbers in these types of situations.  Your boss can easily dismiss the experience of one, but it is a lot more difficult to dismiss the experience of many.

I  wish that we lived in a world and had bosses that would take feedback graciously.   However, the reality is that sometimes we don’t.  However, if your boss creates a toxic culture that is impacting your physical or mental well-being or discriminates against certain employees, you have every right (and even obligation) to speak up.    If your company protects the boss,  that might not be the right place for you to work.

Quit

Sometimes it takes hard circumstances to force you to make a move. If you have a bad boss, maybe it is a sign that you should be looking elsewhere either in your organization or outside.

You will want to consider whether how and for how long you can tolerate your current circumstance.  While nothing is permanent, if it is likely your boss is not going anywhere and staying would cause you harm, you may want to look elsewhere.  Intuition is a powerful thing and should be followed in situations like this.

I had a bad boss at one point in my career. Up to that point, I was very comfortable in my role. I was performing well, getting a lot of recognition. Everything was going great.  When I got reassigned and received a new boss, everything changed.  I felt like I wasn’t respected nor trusted. I wasn’t able to do what I knew I could do to help the organization. I tried all of the above strategies on how to deal with a bad boss but they just didn’t work.

It was really frustrating so I decided to start looking for new opportunities. Looking back, I would not be where I am today without that little “push” to find something else.  As crappy as that situation was, I’m very grateful for it today.

I think that it is good to have a bad boss every now and then.   Difficult situations are where true growth and breakthrough often emerge.   While you are in the situation, just try to make the best of it, take note of what you could do differently, and never forget these lessons.

Tell us about the worst boss that you had.    What were your strategies for dealing with your bad boss? Did it ultimately help or hurt your career?

 

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